12 Steps

12 Steps and Biblical Support

Step 1: We admitted that, in our own strength, we are powerless to rise above our hurts, resentments, unhealthy behaviours and attempts to control. Our lives have become unmanageable.

“For I know that nothing good dwells in me, that is, in my flesh. For I have the desire to do what is right, but not the ability to carry it out.” —Romans 7:18

Step 2: We came to believe that God exists, the He loves us deeply and that, through a personal relationship with Jesus Christ, we can be healed and fulfil the purposes for which we are created.

“For I know the plans I have for you, declares the LORD, plans for peace and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.” —Jeremiah 29:11

Step 3: We made a conscious decision to turn our lives, our pain and our will over to the care of God and the leadership of Jesus Christ.

“The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I came that [you] may have life, and have it abundantly.”—John 10:10

Step 4: We took an inventory of our lives, facing the truth where we’ve been hurt, how we’ve hurt others and the secrets we carry in our hearts.

“Search me, O God, and know my heart! Try me and know my thoughts! And see if there be any grievous way in me…” —Psalms 139:23 – 24A

Step 5: We broke the power of shame by confessing to God and another human being the exact nature of our wrongs, the lies we believed and secrets we vowed to take to the grave.

“Therefore confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, that you may be healed.” —James 5:16

Step 6: We humbly asked God to forgive our wrongdoings and, based on HIS forgiveness, chose to also forgive ourselves. We then forgave those who hurt us, releasing our bitterness and trusting God to bring about justice in His way and timing.

“Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come…And forgive us our sins, for we ourselves forgive everyone who is indebted to us.” —2 Corintians 5:15; Luke 11:4

Step 7: We admitted our shortcomings, pride, sinful tendencies and selfishness without excuse. We repented and asked God to replace our character defects with His character.

“If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and cleanse us from all unrighteousness.” —1 John 1:9

Step 8: We accepted responsibility for how we have harmed others, made a list of those we’ve offended and became willing to make amends to them all.

“If possible, so far as it depends on you, live peaceably with all… And as you wish that others would do to you, do so to them.” —Romans 12:18; Luke 6:31

Step 9: We made specific and direct amends to those we have hurt whenever possible, except when to do so would further injure them or others who are innocent. For such persons, we made specific and indirect amends.

“So if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother has something against you, leave your gift there in front of the altar and go. First be reconciled to your brother, and then come and offer your gift.” —Matthew 5:23-24

Step 10: We entered an authentic relationship with God, learning to hear His voice and understand His will for our lives through Bible reading and personal interaction with the Holy Spirit.

“All Scripture is breathed out by God and profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, and for training in righteousness, that the man of God may be complete, equipped for every good work.” —2 Timothy 3:16-17

Step 11: We determined to live authentically with ourselves, creating a “life plan”to establish priorities, develop integrity and formulate the values by which we will live.

“For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jess for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them.” —Ephesians 2:10

Step 12: We committed to live authentically with others, taking responsibility for our attitudes, judgements, behaviours and boundaries. Realizing our own shortcomings, we offer the same grace to others that God has extended to us. As God gives opportunity we will share our story of finding healing, freedom and purpose for life with others.

“I appeal to you therefore, brothers, by the mercies of God, to present your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and acceptable to God, which is your spiritual worship. Do not conform be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the good and acceptable and perfect will of God.” —Romans 12:1-2